Having recently witnessed – and experienced – the transition from corporeal to non-corporeal of Lord Anandamurtiji, I have been feeling the literary urge once more, this time in order to compose a paean unto Him. Though based on fact, this book is written from memory and consequently there may be occasional errors in respect to certain fine details, especially where the incidents related are derived from secondhand information. However, this book is not intended as a definitive history of Anandamurtiji’s life; rather it is an attempt to delve into some of the more salient mysteries of His life. The substance of this book is largely subjective and interpretive. That which is written here is by no means complete. Neither does it present the entirety of His Passion nor does it offer a complete analysis of the awe-inspiring events of His entire life or even of those particular events recorded here. The fact is that Baba is totally ineffable. In His own words, Anandamurtiji was a mystery, is a mystery, and will always be a mystery.
Naturally, I cannot and therefore do not presume to offer myself as an authority on Lord Anandamurtiji. I do not want to suggest that I fully understand all or even a part of what He has done. In the final analysis only Anandamurtiji is qualified to make a conclusive statement about Anandamurtiji. By His Grace, He did analyze the lives of Lord Shiva and Lord Krishna, but regarding His incarnation as Shrii Shrii Anandamurti, He said precious little of a direct nature. Thus the mystery, and thus our blissful attempts to unravel said mystery. These attempts, because they occupy the realm of better understanding our relationship to and with Him, come under the broad category of Mysticism.
For those who may not be aware, the word ‘Passion’ (with a capital P) denotes great suffering or sacrifice for a noble cause. In spiritual parlance this term is often used in reference to the method whereby a great personality has elected to leave her or his physical body. In this connection, one may be tempted to draw comparisons with past Spiritual Masters. This temptation I shall steadfastly resist.
Finally, I wish to say by way of preface that this book should not be interpreted in a morbid or even a sorrowful fashion. Ever and always He was, is, and will be Anandamurti, the Embodiment of Bliss. Neither He nor we are this physical body. What often appears to the worldly mind as immense suffering proves to be sublimely sweet for one who knowingly and willingly makes the sacrifice. He has told us to be great by our spiritual endeavor, our service, and our sacrifice; and beyond a doubt He has set the ideal example for humanity in all these three respects. However, herein, I wish to address only the subject of His sacrifice as highlighted by His final days as a man residing on planet Earth. May this book be successful in amplifying His glory.
Ac. Abhidevananda Avadhuta
In the latter part of 1954 a young man, only 34 years of age, had gathered his few disciples together in order to make a startling announcement. That very day he intended to leave his body. This young man, barely middle-aged, was Prabhat Rainjan Sarkar. His disciples knew him also as Anandamurti, the Embodiment of Bliss, and they affectionately called him Baba, Beloved Father.
One can scarcely imagine the tremendous shock which those early disciples must have felt, having but recently been blessed to come in contact with their Gurudeva, their Supreme Spiritual Master, only to discover that He would be leaving them so very soon. They protested over and over again, "No, Baba, You must not go, You must not go", but His determination to depart seemed equally strong.
Finally Baba announced that as a going away present He would grant His disciples any wish they cared to make. A senior disciple declared, "Baba, we want only that You remain with us for another fifty years." Baba appeared to be somewhat taken aback. He suggested that His disciples would be better served by requesting spiritual elevation for themselves. But Baba’s recommendation only made those early disciples even more adamant in their original demand. At last Baba declared, "Tatasthu – so be it." Soon thereafter, in January of 1955, Baba inaugurated His Mission as a formal organization – the Ananda Marga Pracaraka Samgha, the Association for Propagation of the Path of Bliss.
Now come the interesting questions of a highly mystical nature – questions which it would seem none of us, including myself, had heretofore considered. First, why did Baba create this entire drama about leaving His body some thirty-five years ago? Even then He knew quite well that His main purpose in taking birth on planet Earth had not yet been fulfilled; rather, if anything, it had barely begun.
And second, why did Baba intentionally mislead us as to the length of time which we could expect Him to remain physically alive? I say here that He ‘intentionally misled’ us simply because there is no doubt in my mind that from the beginning He knew very well that He would complete His work with the body of Prabhat Rainjan Sarkar in the year 1990, that in the year 1990 it would be absolutely vital to the welfare of His Mission that He withdraw Himself from that body. It would be pointless for me to waste the reader’s time trying to establish proof of this conviction as it is essentially a devotional, not a logical, construct. Indeed this entire essay is nothing but an extension of a particular devotional stance which elevates Anandamurtiji to the position of Taraka Brahma, God Incarnate.
For Baba the past, present and future were an open book. On top of that He possessed complete mastery over life and death. Undoubtedly He knew very well in 1954 that He would relinquish His mortal frame in 1990, and equally undoubtedly from 1954 Baba chose to cultivate in our minds the illusion that He would be in physical form until approximately 2005. This illusion He created in many different ways, both subtle and crude. There was the myth that He would spend His last days in Brazil. And up until the fateful day of October 21st of this year Margiis around the world were eagerly anticipating another world tour in the near future. Even the leisurely pace at which Baba was proceeding through the Bengali alphabet in His discourses on philology had at least myself, if no one else, wondering whether He could indeed complete that lengthy topic within the fifteen years which we all assumed were remaining to Him.
One thing more may be added about this second question. From the way it is stated it is clear that it could only be asked after Baba had left. Of course, before Baba’s departure we might have wondered why He ever indicated to us in the first place the duration of His sojourn on Earth. Certainly, Baba had always resisted any pressure to make specific predictions of any sort, and regarding His own plans and programs He never released information in advance. Hence a statement by Him concerning the projected duration of His own life was quite out of character and particularly odd in that it could reasonably be expected to make us less vigilant as to His own security and health requirements and perhaps even a little lethargic about the implementation of His various programs. It is most peculiar that He should have divulged such a critical and monumental piece of information so long in advance, and hence it is absolutely certain that Baba must have had an extremely important motive for doing so. How charming it is to consider that at least superficially He was instructing us in the subtle art of disinformation.
But now let us return to the first question. Why did Baba create that drama in 1954 about leaving His physical body? One explanation might well be that He wished to remind us of the fleeting nature of human existence. Perhaps He wanted us to realize that our time with Him physically among us would be quite limited and therefore we must make the best use of those few years. Certainly Baba was never pleased to see His disciples waste their time.
That is one possibility and surely there will be many other interpretations of this story. For me such a simple interpretation is not entirely satisfying. Rather I would maintain that Baba knew from the start that in order to properly accomplish His mission He would have to leave the final stage of the work entirely (or perhaps more accurately, ‘apparently’) in our hands. Baba knew that so long as He remained among us physically there would always be some degree of dependence which we would feel towards His physical self, His Mahasambhuti. But dependence on anything worldly – even on Mahasambhuti – is ultimately a hindrance to spiritual elevation. The mother eagle cares for all her children’s needs while they are still in their infancy. But once they have matured she pushes them out of the nest and in that crisis of ‘fly or die’ the eaglets spread their wings and discover their true nature.
Baba knew that He would have to leave us with the last phase of establishing Sadvipra Samaja (the ideal human society) yet to be accomplished. Baba knew that if all were completed in His physical presence, then we would certainly feel that perhaps He had done everything Himself – not indirectly through us, but directly through the medium of His own Mahasambhuti. A seed of self-doubt might well have sprouted in the mind of collective humanity. Ultimately that could have left us lacking in the necessary self-confidence to march boldly ahead into the blissful New Age which had already begun with His advent onto the planet.
Baba always knew that the time would come when His continued physical presence on Earth would prove counter-productive to His Mission. Nobody could have blamed Him for staying longer, but to have done so would have diminished both His greatness and ours. Brhattvad Brahma Brm’hanattvad Brahma. God is the greatest; His role is to make everyone as great as He.
So it happened that by 1990, at the age of 69, Baba had given everything which we could possibly digest and indeed had gone far beyond our capacity for comprehension at this time. His latest discourses on spiritual philosophy literally boggle the mind. His science of microvita is mostly beyond the research capacity of contemporary technology. His highly inspiring Prabhat Samgiit with a total of 5018 songs is more than sufficient challenge for the musicians of today. His spiritual practices which He has updated and often created are both extensive and comprehensive – more than adequate for our all-round development physically, mentally and spiritually. His Progressive Utilization Theory (PROUT) has been sufficiently elaborated so that there should be no undue confusion or difficulty in its implementation. His vision of a glorious new humanity encapsulated in His biannual Vaniis, or special messages, and elaborated in His revelations on Neo-Humanism have yet to be fully realized by the people of this planet, though when that day comes it will be a boon of inestimable value not only for the human race as a whole but for all animate and even inanimate beings as well. The list of Anandamurtiji’s achievements is almost endless, but perhaps most important of all in the context of His overall Mission, He has established the Ananda Marga Pracaraka Samgha with all its subsidiary, affiliated and Ideologically sympathetic organizations. He has forged in the fire of constant struggle the framework and structure which will perpetuate His Mission for thousands of years to come, not just on planet Earth but reaching out across the Universe.
Baba has said on many occasions that when the time comes that His work on this earth is complete then He would not remain for an extra moment. Not only would it be undignified for Him to idle away His time, but surely there are countless others who desperately need Him elsewhere. Baba had warned us that the day would come when He would have to go. And surely it is obvious as well. After all, it is commonly said that whoever takes birth is born but to die. But then all the philosophy in the world is of no comfort to one who is soon to be bereft of one’s most dearly beloved.
At this stage the answer to both our first and our second questions becomes clear. Indeed the two questions are very closely interconnected. The drama in 1954 demonstrated that with merely a few disciples it was almost impossible for Baba to leave them after having given any prior intimation of His impending departure. Certainly in the year 1990 with thousands upon thousands of disciples all over the world, He would have faced even greater pressure to stay behind on that fateful day when His duty demanded that He move on. So Baba’s most closely guarded secret had to be the actual time and manner of His departure.
Just to make the problem even more complicated Baba chose for His method of departure to literally work Himself to death with three successive heart attacks over a span of ten months. But this time, unlike 1954, there was no concerted cry from all His devotees, "Baba, don’t go; Baba, don’t go." And why not? Because in 1990, all of Baba’s devotees were firmly convinced that Baba would be staying with us for another fifteen years. Even when Baba underwent His first two heart attacks we were spared the agony of fully lamenting His sufferings. And when the third instance of cardiac arrest finally robbed us of His physical presence our faith that He could not have left us prematurely provided most of us with several days to cope with the shocking possibility that His Mahasambhuti would no longer be present to support us. Almost all of us were blessed with several days of Grace in which we could come gently to the conclusion that He was really gone.
Baba created the drama of 1954 in order to justify His need to leave us without advance warning. And in order to enable Him to leave us by the method He had selected without our ever again being in a position to oppose His (this time) necessary departure or for us to have any opportunity to mourn His passing in advance and even to lessen the intensity of our mourning after He was gone, the illusion of 50 years was established and assiduously maintained.
Those who are acquainted with the concept of Satya or benevolent truthfulness will recognize in this explanation a standard of Satya Himalayan in proportion. It is a standard of loving compassion never even conceived before. It is a standard which only God Himself could have set. And it is a standard which is consonant with all the events of Baba’s life yet to be discussed in this book.
During the days that Baba languished in jail I had frequent opportunities to meet with Him under one pretext or another. On one occasion which I can never forget Baba revealed to me at least one aspect of His personal Mission. At the time He was still under sentence of life imprisonment and still maintaining a protest fast which had already entered its fourth year. From an objective viewpoint one might have expected Baba to be quite disheartened. But that was a state of mind which nobody ever witnessed in Lord Anandamurtiji. Today I can still hear the words He spoke to me on that auspicious occasion. He said, "I don’t want to criticize and it is not right to criticize... our ancestors, but I must say this because it is true. Our ancestors did not do their complete duty." Immediately I interrupted Baba and asked, "Baba, what about Krishna?" Lord smiled broadly and conceded, "He did something, of course, but He did not do His complete duty." Then with a slow and careful stress on each word Baba declared, "I want to see sufficient change in every sphere of human existence while I am still in physical form."
His advent upon this planet on 21 May 1921 inaugurated Ananda Yuga, the Age of Bliss. During the course of His life He witnessed humanity at its worst contrasted with humanity ardently seeking the Truth. Six million Jews were herded like cattle towards the most efficient extermination that Twentieth Century technology could then devise. But they were not cattle; they were human beings. And when they cried out against this monstrous brutality, we could easily comprehend their agonized lament. In that darkest hour of human history, all the arduous efforts for advancement by human civilization over the last 15,000 years seemed destined to attain nothing but a cruel mockery of any higher human aspirations. Then, more moving than the plaintive dirge of European Jewry was their unwavering proclamation of faith – "Ani Ma’amin", I believe... I believe the Savior will come to save my people, to save the human race.
The Jews who died in the Nazi concentration camps could not have known that already the Lord had come, that even then He was laying the foundation for His earth-shaking Mission, that this time He would do His complete duty.
In the early years of His life both Communism and National Socialism (two of the most insidious socio-political theories ever devised) took root upon this planet. During His 69 years He saw both theories demolished. He visited Berlin in 1979 and deplored the fact that a once-proud but noble nation had been torn asunder by victorious vultures after the Second World War. He declared that Germany must be reunited soon, and that also He lived to see.
By the end of Baba’s life, on all fronts dogma had begun to give way before rationality; and every divisive sentiment had been sharply confronted with a new, universal or holistic outlook. In order to preserve the cultural heritage of all the nations of the earth and in recognition of the diverse environmental and socio-economic conditions prevailing in different parts of the world, the approach to social progress currently in vogue is essentially universal in outlook but regional in application. This enlightened attitude allocates equal importance to both the individual and the society. Ultimately what is good for the individual is good for the society, and what is good for the society is good for the individual. (Here it must be kept in mind that the word, ‘good’, is to be interpreted primarily from a spiritual angle of vision, i.e. with a view towards the all-round welfare of the individual or the collective body.) In those parts of the world today where regional movements ostensibly appear to be pulling their country apart, the underlying momentum for those movements is not at all divisive; rather it is a demand for an equal human dignity which has been lacking in an inequitable coalition of nations arbitrarily dubbed as one State by a dominant elite of opportunists. In every direction human awareness has been expanded and uplifted. On environmental and ecological issues, human beings are demanding that greater care be taken to preserve the subtle balance of nature. Recently, in connection with Neo-Humanism, Baba remarked that inanimate matter also has life; inanimate matter is also evolving. That is why, Baba said, while walking He is always careful not to unnecessarily disturb even the stones.
Concerning human rights, there is a strong and growing movement for the upliftment of all the suppressed segments of society – women, blacks, etc. Not only has there been a sea change in human awareness regarding the great injustices perpetrated but also concerted efforts are even now going on to right the wrongs.
In the cultural arena the base and ultimately degrading philosophy of ‘art for art’s sake’ has been replaced with a new spirit of ‘art for service and blessedness’. Artists, actors, writers and musicians around the world are acquiring a more pronounced social conscience. They have awakened to a growing cognizance of their social responsibility and are hence dedicating more and more of their talents and their time for worthwhile causes.
The list of changes which have come about since 1955 are almost without end. Truly, in every walk of life, in every sphere of human existence, there has been significant and progressive innovation.
But over the years Anandamurtiji was no passive spectator to this transformation. Rather in each and every sphere He presented His own Ideological position, created His own organizational structure to implement that Ideology, and perhaps most important of all set an ideal example of what it means to actually live for and by that Ideology.
With the departure of Lord Anandamurtiji the first and most glorious period of this new Age of Bliss has drawn to a close. It is certain that no one can match His awesome stature, for He was a paragon beyond compare. But His passing only marks the ‘end of the beginning’ for by His actions and by His very life, Anandamurtiji has given such an impact to human society that we will go on spiraling upwards for thousands of years to come.
To properly describe the way Baba lived His life is next to impossible. With Him every action, every pose, every expression was exquisite. His timing and his taste were also impeccable.
Some fifteen years ago I had a peculiar and blissful experience. I was in Australia at the time, and for an entire week I could think of nothing else except how much I liked Baba. Not how much I loved Baba, but how much I liked Him. One may love everybody but still there will be some persons towards whom one has a personal preference, whose company one especially enjoys. That is the difference between liking and loving. And so for one full week I went around in a semi-intoxicated state, talking to everybody I could collar about all the small things pertaining to Baba which pleased me so much – the way He smiles, the way He moves His hands, the way He swivels His head, the way He walks, the way He talks, on and on and on. And to everyone I would explain, "Of course I love Baba. That goes without saying. But on top of that I really like Him as well." That same week one Margii sister from Australia had gone to India and had the opportunity to meet with Baba in jail. During that meeting Baba asked her from where she was coming and when she replied Australia, then Baba asked her, "Do you know Abhidevananda?" When she answered in the affirmative, Baba said, "I like that boy."
There are so many touching stories which could be told here about His style of working and His mode of behavior, but I wish to mention only a few which I feel are intimately connected with His Passion. While viewing Baba from these perspectives, His omniscience is manifest in countless subtle ways. But it is not that omniscience which I want to stress. Rather, what is significant here is the human perfection that Baba embodied at all times.
Whenever one must do some concentrated mental or spiritual work, then physical motivity is automatically reduced. In the early part of Baba’s life, as a student and later as a young man working as a clerk for the railways, Baba was quite active physically. He practiced many sports (including wrestling and a little boxing), and He even taught dance. However, from the time He took up full-time work as President of the Ananda Marga Pracaraka Samgha, then gradually His physical movement became more and more restricted. The transition was gradual but over the years He ended up spending increasingly more time conducting His activities from the sanctum of His bedroom.
It was not that Baba particularly enjoyed life confined within four walls. On the other hand it did not seem to disturb Him either. Baba spent seven years in jail due to the evil machinations of inimical forces, but He always remained unperturbed. During the last ten years of His life pressure of work imprisoned Him in His own bedroom almost to the same extent as His prison days, but again He remained unperturbed. After all, His Mission was everything to Baba. Out of love for us no sacrifice was too great. In the last thirty-five years of His life Baba never went to any theater or cinema and never attended any cultural function which He did not preside over as the main attraction. Every ordinary worldly enjoyment He was prepared to forgo for the sake of performing His duty.
Sitting in His room He controlled the movements of His devotees worldwide. Sitting in His room Baba called His devotees to Him at a moment’s notice from anywhere in the world, and sitting in His room He dispatched His workers to even the most remote corners of the planet. Of course Baba was God Himself. In His formless state He is the nucleus of the entire Universe, but in physical form He required a fixed abode. That abode was not a particular country or state, not a city or even an address in a city. It was not even a house at a particular address, but rather just one room in any house which He inhabited. Baba’s simplicity of lifestyle was simply breathtaking.
While analyzing the life of Krishna Baba explained that Krishna’s life could be divided into two distinct periods. First was His time in Vrindaban as Vraja Krishna and thereafter His days as Parthasarathi Krishna. The distinction is important, not the least because Krishna’s external behavior became much sterner in the latter phase and access to Krishna became more and more confined to Princes and Kings. To accentuate the change in roles the story is told of Krishna’s departure from Vrindaban that His devotees crowded around His chariot refusing to let the chariot move. Some lay down before the chariot preferring to die than to see their beloved Krishna depart from their midst. Krishna simply ordered His charioteer, "Drive on, drive on – if necessary, drive over the bodies of my Devotees. Nobody can stand in between me and my Mission. My Duty must be done."
In contrast, looking back over the life of Anandamurtiji, He attracted a band of devotees and gradually He goaded us to do more and more work for His mission, more and more work for the downtrodden of this earth. He trained us to do His work as per His satisfaction – each of us individually according to the role which He wanted us to play but collectively adequate to the long term perpetuation of His Mission in an organizational sense. And when the day came that He was indeed satisfied, He departed to carry on with His Duty elsewhere, leaving behind His Earth-bound ‘chariot’ which was of no further use to Him and also His Earth-bound devotees who meant and still mean all the world to Him.
Throughout His life Baba remained Vraja Krishna. Although He did adopt some of the severity of Parthasarathi in respect to organizational matters, Anandamurtiji never reserved Himself for the worldly powers. Rather He confined Himself with His devotees, His Margiis. In many ways, toward the end of His life, the general Margiis, those with lesser organizational responsibility, started to receive more attention from Him than the whole-time workers. Baba even devised a new system of meditation essentially for the householder Margiis which He personally imparted individually to several hundred general Margiis from around the world.
Though Anandamurtiji was strict about work and even harsh in punishing any slackness in our efforts to complete our targets, nevertheless He remained our Baba. He was not a celestial being, nor even a worldly celebrity – He was a simple man whose every breath was taken with love for all His children. And to ensure that we would always be close to Him He transferred His Vrindaban to the psychic and spiritual planes where (unlike the physical plane) there can be no question of anyone’s personal contact with Him restricting the access of others to Him at the same time as well. Baba transferred His Vrindaban to the psychic and spiritual planes, and He made sure that we all know the way to get there. Indeed, in June of 1990, just five months before leaving this world, Baba introduced Gurusaka’sha, one last spiritual practice for all Margiis. By this method even a new Margii with only the most elementary instruction in meditation nevertheless can enjoy a private rendezvous with Baba the first thing every morning in the sanctuary of her or his own Guru Cakra.
Anandamurtiji has shown all Margiis the Path to Bliss and He has made it our bounden duty to endeavor to bring everyone to this Path. During His life Anandamurtiji never forgot or neglected anyone – He remembered all those who were co-existing with His Mahasambhuti, He gave respect to all those who came before His latest Advent, and He made benevolent provision for all those who are yet to come in future.
This most remarkable personality, Lord Anandamurtiji, whose glory outshines even the supernovas recorded by astronomers, came upon planet Earth in 1921 and departed in 1990 with hardly a tremor being felt. No doubt He was controversial during His life-time, but the truth about Him exists as historical fact. Soon all the controversy will be whisked away as a strong wind might dissipate the flimsy clouds which can temporarily hide the sun. Yes, during His life-time occasional battles erupted between the righteous and the evil forces. But the fact is that these battles were nothing but preliminary skirmishes. During His life-time battle lines were drawn, but the major or final confrontation never took place, was never intended to occur. Rather that is yet and soon to come. Regarding Anandamurtiji, His uniqueness was that He always preferred to move quietly, to walk with silent footsteps. While He lived, He always kept His personality and even some of His greatest personal achievements (such as Prabhat Samgiit) in the background.
It is said that Lord is Hari, the Divine Thief, because He steals from us our bad samskaras, the reactions which we should have to undergo for our previous mistakes. But Anandamurtiji has given a new meaning to this concept of ‘Hari’, for indeed He stole onto this planet and ultimately stole away in such a fashion as if He really did not want the world to know that He had come until after He had gone. He introduced Himself in song as the Ajana Patik, the mysterious Unknown Traveler.
When Baba took leave of us, He departed in the same manner as He came and as He lived. There were no formal goodbyes, no announcements of the exact date of His departure, and this time not even any special instructions for us to follow in His absence. This last ‘world tour’ which Baba is making was embarked upon without tour program or Central workers, without His personal assistant or even His own physical body. There was no need for any ‘special’ or ‘final’ instructions because He has already given us everything we require and we are adequately trained to carry on the Mission without direct supervision by His Mahasambhuti. Furthermore the question of His actual ‘absence’ does not really arise.
He came with silent footsteps, He walked our planet with silent footsteps, He left with silent footsteps. But now each one of those silent footsteps thunderously proclaims His Supreme Greatness.
Vraja Krishna had to drive over the bodies of His devotees at the time of leaving Vrindaban, but Anandamurtiji, by His silent approach to both life and death, was able to avoid such a painful scene. However, that does not mean that He did not take leave of us in advance by various subtle ways.
The fact is that everyone I have spoken to who has reflected upon their last meeting with Baba, their last message from Baba, their last DMC with Baba are all understanding that on each of those occasions Baba knew that it was a farewell event. He, the all-knowing Entity, provided a unique experience for everyone individually on their last contact with Him.
It is remarkable for me to realize now but my last opportunity to enjoy His Varabhaya Mudra was on the occasion of His 69th birthday. Quite miraculously I came late but still managed to secure the very best seat in the Darshan Hall – front row, dead center. And though I could take this seat only by rudely walking in front of a most senior Dada who was delivering an inspiring speech, coming between him and the entire assembly, I moved mechanically towards that seat not at all aware of what I was doing nor why He wanted me to do so. After Baba’s discourse and mudra, I felt deeply, and others stated as well, that His mudra seemed to be directed right at me. Afterwards I remarked that I need not even attend the upcoming DMC, that I was fully satisfied with what I had received on His birthday. And as it happened circumstances conspired to prevent me from attending that DMC or indeed from receiving any of His mudras in the months to come before His departure.
Even more unique, my last opportunity to appear in organizational reporting before Baba was more than six years ago. At that time, Baba had been giving everyone a tremendous, rather an impossible, target and awarding punishment in advance just to ensure that the target would be fulfilled by the due date. However, when I stood before Baba, He merely asked me if I would complete the target. There was no alternative but to say, "Yes, Baba." Upon hearing my assurance, Baba announced that there was no need to punish me as I had given my word and my word could be relied upon.
About one and a half years ago I was in Zambia conducting an AMURT relief operation on behalf of flood victims. On that occasion Baba passed a remark to the General Secretary which GSda immediately relayed to me. These were the last words which He ever spoke about me (or at least the last comment of His about myself which was communicated to me during His lifetime), and I am sure that He intended these words as His parting message to me. It would be immodest of me to quote what Baba had said but I may mention that His words indicated that He had never forgotten me and that He would never forget me. Those last words of Baba’s were His assurance to me that wherever He goes He will bring me with Him – at least mentally.
As aforesaid, my experience, special as it is to me, nevertheless cannot be viewed as a singular occurrence. Many persons have told similar stories. Even more interesting, perhaps, it may be mentioned that before His departure He gave suitable advice and assurances to carry His worldly family through any temporary difficulties which they might experience due to the demise of the eldest surviving member and de facto head of the extended family, i.e. Himself. Of course, it would be indelicate for me to reveal what Baba had said of a personal nature to others, especially to those of His worldly family, without their express permission, and such permission I would not have the audacity to request.
Baba took leave from each of us not only individually but also collectively. There were hints which none of us could decipher. When He told us that the Mission was somewhat ahead of schedule – on one occasion He even announced that we were 15-16 years ahead of His planning – we could not grasp that such an assessment meant that He would be leaving us sooner. Nor did it occur to anyone to question how it was possible for the All-knowing Entity and All-powerful Entity to actually be even one second ahead of schedule, what to speak of 15 years ahead.
Yet there was another, more telling, drama which He played out which should have clued us in to what was coming. Over the last five years Baba had started distancing Himself from us physically. In reporting and in special organizational meetings, on the pretext of health, He used to make us stand a small distance away from Him, saying, "Be mentally close but a bit distant physically." Thereafter He started taking reports throughout the morning from inside His room with the door opened just slightly. And finally most of the time we found ourselves listening to His words coming faintly through the crack under His bedroom door. In this way, without ever saying so, Baba was preparing us for the time soon to come when He would be physically gone and we would have no alternative but to listen for His voice in the depths of our meditation.
Lord Anandamurtiji always instructed us that throughout life we must go on working. He said that we must work even while dying and even our death should be a useful work. As an instruction, it sounded inspiring, but one could not easily comprehend how the ordinary person should interpret such advice. In a Dharmik war, while fighting for the sake of righteousness, one might reasonably die or rather be killed, in the heat of battle. In that case one can be said to have worked while dying. And if one had died fighting in a particularly courageous fashion, then perhaps one’s death might be sufficiently inspiring to classify as a work in itself. But certainly such circumstances are not normal. What is the ordinary person to do?
As always Baba identified with the common people, set an example which not just a few persons but rather everyone could take inspiration from. Over the course of ten torturous months Baba endured three consecutive heart attacks, the last of which on 21 October 1990 claimed His life. He knew very well that His time was limited. After the second heart attack He knew for His doctors had told Him (and us, though we never dreamed that Baba would be leaving us that way) that the third attack would be fatal. He had been advised by the doctors that in order to survive, His work pace would have to slow down, but after each of the first two attacks He insisted on working even in the private nursing home in which He had been installed and He demanded that He be returned to His own home long before the doctors were ready to discharge Him.
On the surface, up till the last moment there was nothing abnormal about Baba’s last days. At 11:00 P.M. on the eve of His demise He composed His last two songs (5017 and 5018). On His last day, He was found to be taking reports and giving instructions even while shaving. Right up to the very end Baba followed strictly His normal, intense work routine. Beyond a doubt Baba showed us how to work while dying. Moreover, He created such a psychological environment that we could not realize He was in fact dying, that we would make no more than modest efforts to slow down His work pace. To be fair, although the Margiis as a whole were not involved in this endeavor, still those who were in closest physical contact with Baba (such as His Personal Assistant and the General Secretary) did try their very best and by all possible means at their disposal to spare Baba any unnecessary exertion. But despite all their best efforts, Baba could not be deterred. As ever He was a self-motivated man. He knew how to create His own work.
Baba showed us how to work while dying. But His example illuminates far more than that. The time had come when for the welfare of His Mission Baba had no recourse but to leave this world. On one occasion soon after Baba’s acquittal and subsequent release from prison, Baba had told me a few things about the nature of His prolonged fast. He explained to me that He had been performing a special Tantrik practice. By this practice He had been able to rejuvenate each and every organ of His body. The doctors who examined Him just before His release from jail had found that He had the constitution of a young man of twenty-five, not an elderly gentleman of 57. Baba explained that conserving His energy and fasting for all those long years had enabled Him to renew every portion of His body except His eyes. He had even started to grow a third set of teeth. Then Baba remarked that even His eyesight would have been made perfect if He could have continued His fast for another few weeks, but He had to come out of jail when He did for the welfare of His Mission. He even passed a joke at that stage, noting that as of that time He was the only person on the planet who knew the method of performing this particular Tantrik practice and that when He should leave His body this particular science might well be lost along with Him. For this reason He had wanted to teach this technique to some of His children. But as He said, "Unfortunately my children are all too busy. How will they find the time to practice such a sadhana?"
Baba had all the occult powers. On countless occasions He had healed others of every conceivable disease and had even brought the dead back to life. But not once did He exercise these occult powers for His own personal benefit. On the one occasion that He actually did something for His own health, it was not by an act of occult power or divine healing, but as an ordinary effect of an arduous sadhana (spiritual practice) which He Himself painstakingly performed.
Anandamurtiji gave up His eyesight for the sake of His Mission – the right time had come for Baba to emerge from jail. And similarly when the right time had come for Him to break free from all worldly bondage, then He gave up His very life. He left the jail with a heart like that of a twenty-five year old, but that same heart was so overtaxed by extreme pressure of work that it could give out after just twelve additional years of service.
On what grounds can we say that the right time had come for Baba to leave His body? This is a very difficult question and one which nobody but He could answer satisfactorily. After all our awareness of the time factor is very much constricted by spatial and personal factors. Who can say what urgent duties were demanding His presence elsewhere? Who can fully comprehend what was the global impact of His passing away – what was the impact in the mind of each of His devotees, what was the impact in the mind of each of His enemies? To be quite honest I never have understood what made August 2, 1978 the critical day when He just had to leave jail. But one thing I can say, and that is that in the life of every spiritual practitioner there comes a time when even the most holy attachment to the physical form of Guru also becomes an impediment to her or his spiritual elevation. Even attraction to Guru can become a sort of unhealthy dependence. With Baba, His method was always to carry all of us ahead on the spiritual path together. Before each Dharmacakra we chant a mantra of collective movement – ‘Sam’gacchadvam’. At each Dharma Maha Cakra, before He gave His blessing and His mudra, Baba also chanted that same mantra, ‘Sam’gacchadvam’. Perhaps the stage had come for all of us individually and collectively when His continued physical presence would have been a hindrance to our further development. I do not state this possibility as a fact; I do not even wish to assert it. For even though a devotee might acknowledge the validity of such an argument on the intellectual plane, from the heart such a notion can never be accepted.
There is only one thing which I am sure of in connection with the timing of His departure. Many great personalities throughout history tarnished their reputations by living too long after their worldly recognition. In the case of Lord Anandamurtiji, that worldly recognition was only just starting to occur at the time of His demise. World acclaim never came for Baba during His lifetime, nor was His Ideology ever properly implemented. So there is no way that His glorious reputation can possibly be sullied. On one hand much of the honor due to Him will be heaped upon His devotees collectively, but on the other hand any blame for future defects in the implementation of His Ideology will equally come down on our heads.
In any event it is certain that His ‘death’ was also an important work. Krishna chose to leave His body through the medium of a poisoned arrow striking His foot. No doubt He could have survived that poison had He wanted, but that was not His wish. As for Baba, He had already swallowed poison in the jail and survived. That was not the method by which He intended to leave His body. Rather Baba chose for Himself one of the most common causes of death, cardiac arrest. And by His unwavering and wholehearted commitment to Ideology, He managed to resolve by His example one of the burning issues of the day – the question of euthanasia. Life has its dignity, and so also does death. But a fully dignified death can only be achieved if one never values mere physical existence more than Ideology. Human existence is more a psychic existence than a physical one and as such it should always be an Ideological flow. We have to fuse our very life with our Ideology. Like Baba we must be merged in our Mission. To preserve one’s physical existence at the expense of Ideology is worse than death. Life without Ideology cannot be considered human. Those who wish to die with dignity need only live (and work) – as our Baba did – with full commitment for the welfare and happiness of all.
Not only has Baba instructed us to work while dying and die while working, He also insisted that whatever work we take up should be finished properly.
According to Baba each work has three phases – beginning, middle and end. Each phase should be performed properly. Anandamurtiji Himself, as Taraka Brahma, came on planet Earth as Savior and Lord of every living being, every sentient creature. In fact He even cared for the inanimate beings as well, illustrated earlier by His manner of walking. So, before His departure, it was absolutely essential for Baba to demonstrate convincingly His love for one and all.
Towards the end of His life Baba started many new programs. Over the last ten years, every time we came for reporting before Baba, we have been obliged by Him to bring with us various plants from around the world. Baba insisted that we bring Him plants of each and every species, each and every variety. Each time any plants were brought (and nobody was allowed into reporting without bringing plants), the list of plants was read out to Him. Thus almost every day Baba would receive hundreds of plants. It may be mentioned here that Baba never forgot anything, and on top of that He knew every plant which exists on the planet. So gradually Baba managed to have brought before Him virtually every type of plant existing on Earth. These plants were brought into His physical presence. Every day Baba would inspect the more interesting or rarer plants and at that time or while walking through His garden He would speak something about the divers plants – their Samskrta name, their Latin name, their local name, what was their evolutionary history over the last millions of years, what animals fed from their various parts, what beneficial effects or cures may be derived from them, what climatic and soil conditions are optimum to nurture them, in which parts of the globe they should be transplanted and how they will benefit the ecology and economy in those places, etc. To go with Baba on a tour of His garden on the special occasions known as ‘Garden Demonstration’ was not only immensely enchanting but also mind expanding as well.
Baba’s love for the plant kingdom was complete. If a plant were so common or so apparently insignificant that it had not been given a proper name, then Baba Himself would give it a name. Baba loved His plants so much that one of the most dreaded posts in Ananda Marga used to be Personal Assistant Number Two, for his duties were to care for Baba’s plants. And though there were literally thousands upon thousands of different plants in and around Baba’s house, Baba knew intimately what was the condition of each of those plants. Whenever any one of those plants should die due to the slightest inattention on the part of PA II, then Baba not only scolded that PA II but gave him punishment as well.
I remember on the occasion when Baba called me for Garden Demonstration, Baba had just explained something about the fragrance of the leaves of one particular tree which we were standing by. Baba continued walking, but I lingered behind for just a second, being curious to smell what Baba had described. I reached up to remove just one leaf from that tree or perhaps just to pull the branch down towards me so I could smell the leaves. But before I could even touch the tree, Baba – Who had been facing in completely the opposite direction – whirled around and ordered, "Don’t touch that tree!" I was struck dumb, feeling as if I had committed some enormous sin. Then Baba smiled, removed one leaf from the tree Himself, crushed that leaf with His own hands, and then gave it to me to smell.
In the last five years, Baba began insisting that we bring Him various animals as well. In furtherance of this program He established a wildlife sanctuary at Ananda Nagar. What Baba has told about the various animals (their lifestyles, basic requirements and peculiar psychology) would fill many books. Also on occasion Baba was even more specific about certain individual animals, such as the particular ostriches which were sent from South Africa.
All in all, Anandamurtiji came on this planet for everyone – not just for human beings. He was Baba for every living creature – animate and inanimate; corporeal and non-corporeal; past, present and future. But of all the categories of beings in this world the one category with the most complexity and the most complexes is the human being. So before leaving it was important for Baba to balance the scales of Love in respect to the human race. It would not have been proper for Him to have left the impression that He had a greater love for one individual or another, or one group of individuals or another. For Baba there was no ‘most beloved disciple’, no class of individuals who were closest to Him. Everyone He loved equally. This ‘balancing of the scales’ Baba managed by paying an immense amount of attention to the householder Margiis, especially those Margiis holding some responsible post within the organization (such as ‘Bhukti Pradhan’) or operating as full-time cadres within the structure (i.e. LFTs). Indeed Baba had started giving so much attention to the General Margiis that I had begun to wonder whether I had perhaps made a wrong decision about the lifestyle I had adopted (though, of course, these were only fleeting emotions which arose when I wondered how much opportunity I would have to be close to Baba physically during the next 15 years – those imaginary 15 years).
Baba loved everyone equally. But His love for all was of so great a quantity and quality that after He departed I find everyone talking as if Baba had singled out herself or himself for very special attention. To be honest, I feel it myself, and I cannot change that feeling, although I know intellectually that Baba loved us all the same. Even in physical form, Baba was God. Now, after His departure, I cannot imagine how He could have loved me more, and I feel confident that His love and His power are still supporting me to exactly the same extent as always. In the final analysis, the Love which we all experienced coming from Anandamurtiji was of such magnitude and fullness that all those who were blessed to have His physical contact cannot help but feel, "Baba was mine, and He is still mine – mine and mine alone."
In the final five days from 21-26 October, when His Mahasambhuti lay in state like the most sacred sacrifice ever offered on the altar of humanity, thousands and thousands of His devotees from around India and around the world filed around His body to pay Him homage. What each person saw and felt was certainly highly personal. I, for one, never once viewed His body without seeing His chest moving up and down as if He were breathing. I had to keep checking the shroud to see whether or not any of the wrinkles on it had changed their position, but of course they had not. I also knew that Baba could never make us endure such agony of parting a second time, but still I just could not see His body in a lifeless state. And so my eyes went on deceiving me regarding this one point, but as to every other particular they were brutally constant. I witnessed everything which was plain for all to see. I saw the gradual marks of decomposition appearing on His face, His eyes closed but still framed by those simple and outmoded, black glasses. And I saw His left foot, slightly deformed after it had been operated upon some five or six years back.
Under His shroud I knew there were other scars on His body which were concealed; and, still deeper, within His body I knew about the heart which had been cruelly tortured out of compassion for a heartless world, a heart which had to endure the unimaginable anguish of betrayal by those who should have been nearest and dearest along with the enforced isolation which that betrayal thereafter imposed, a heart which had to conceal and absorb all the pain of impending separation from the beloved – in short a human heart compelled to beat with Divine Love.
One cannot talk about the Passion of Anandamurtiji without contemplating these aspects of His life. Baba came for us, He lived for us, and ultimately He died for us. From beginning to end He was ours. His final march to death took place over a ten month period from December 1989 to October 1990, but this was by no means the entire extent of His Passion. I have often thought that it is a relatively easy matter to die for Dharma considering just how difficult it is to really live for Dharma. But Baba has demonstrated that living and dying for Dharma are in fact inseparable. To do one is automatically to do the other, for Dharma alone dictates the course of our life and the timing of our death. Our Duty is only to adhere unflinchingly to that Dharma.
Anandamurtiji was not only the Embodiment of Bliss but also the Embodiment of Dharma. After His departure the same Truth applies – where there is Dharma, there is Anandamurti; where there is Anandamurti, there is victory.
Sometimes, while contemplating the vastness of His Love, we may forget the fine points of that same Love, like failing to see the trees for the forest. But the fact is that Love is an absolute Truth – it operates the same for one and all. If you love someone, then you want to share that person’s company. If you love someone, then you treasure whatever gifts you may have received from that person. Baba also evinced all these ‘lesser’ emotions, although He certainly never let them stand in the way of His Duty.
In 1984 or 1985 a devotee from a major city in India sent to Baba a special pair of shoes fitted with magnets which he claimed would cure Baba’s diabetes and other physical ailments. For several days, out of His love for that devotee (and perhaps so that such a story as this might be told), Baba used to call for His ‘magnetic shoes’ whenever He would take His accustomed walks. It goes almost without saying that His diabetes was never cured. Unfortunately, that was not the end of the matter, for nobody noticed that in the left shoe some portion of one magnet was sticking up and pricking Baba’s left foot. (In those days Baba never wore socks. With my own eyes I saw Baba walking through snow on the heights of the Swiss Alps in His ordinary shoes and without socks.) In His simplicity Baba also took no notice of any discomfort. But after a few days it was found that Baba’s foot had become infected and ultimately an operation was required.
When the operation was to be performed, the doctor wanted to administer a general anesthetic or at least a local anesthetic; but Baba refused any anesthesia at all. Having the complete control over His mind which any life-time practitioner of meditation might well achieve, Baba could easily withdraw His mind from the operation taking place on His foot. However, I was told that when Baba’s remaining teeth had been removed prior to His being fitted with false teeth, Baba had indicated certain pressure points on His body which when pressed would function in the place of anesthetics for the mouth. Perhaps He also gave some similar instruction on this occasion as well although I never heard about it.
After the operation, due to the removal of tissue, a certain amount of deformation was noticed in the area of the big toe. Doctors assured Baba that this deformation could be eliminated by a simple operation involving the grafting of skin from His thigh to the area already operated on His foot. But Baba refused this operation as He did not agree that skin from one part of His body should be transferred to another part.
Thereafter, whenever Baba appeared in public as for General Darshan, He always wore very thick woolen socks. These socks were no doubt quite uncomfortable for Him, and indeed He was never wearing them when we used to meet Him in the privacy of His bedroom. So why did He wear them? Certainly it was not because He was in the least bit embarrassed by the appearance of His left foot. He wore them only to spare His devotees the pain of seeing what had happened to one of His Lotus Feet. He did not want our minds disturbed or distracted by what for Him was a minor and essentially inconsequential injury.
From the time of His operation Baba also had to use a cane whenever He walked some distance, and quite naturally the speed of His walking was much diminished. But this apparent hindrance Baba also took in stride, converting His cane into a pointer and a rostrum. Although occasional memories of His former, vigorous speed would bring tears to my eyes, what I saw after His operation was that Baba walked with even more nobility than ever before. His movement was like that of a grand steamship cruising down the river. In His walk there was neither pride nor arrogance, but His every step was imposing nonetheless simply because of His inherent greatness. Baba was only 5’2" in height, but He was a giant of a man.
To possess a physical body is to know imperfection, for nothing of this physical world can ever be considered perfect in an absolute sense. The beauty queen of today may retain her pleasing appearance for an extra twenty or thirty years if she takes extraordinary care and also resorts to cosmetic surgery from time to time. But eventually the ravages of time will take their toll. Even the beauty queen cannot escape occasional disease and eventual death.
In general for the first thirty-nine years of life the human body along with its glandular system goes on developing, but thereafter the body tends to degenerate. And on top of this general trend, every body has hereditary qualities, certain genetic factors, with their various pros and cons. Hence when Anandamurtiji accepted the limitation of a human body, He simultaneously accepted the inevitability of a certain amount of physical frailty and disorder.
From a very young age Baba was seen to wear glasses. Perhaps this was hereditary, as His mother, too, wore glasses and His elder sister ultimately became virtually blind. But for whatever reason, Baba certainly did have problems with His eyes. Baba also suffered from cataracts, and in the winter of 1981 or 1982 He underwent surgery for removal of those cataracts. But what is interesting in Baba’s case is that at any time He could easily have dispensed with His spectacles. Once Baba joked with us about His extreme nearsightedness. He removed His glasses and asked one Margii standing on the other side of the room to hold up a newspaper. Baba then proceeded to read the paper aloud from that great distance. Afterwards Baba put on His glasses once more, and once more He was very near-sighted.
Baba’s eyesight was so poor that His night vision was almost non-existent. In the second half of 1979 I had the sublime opportunity to serve Baba for about one week in the unofficial capacity of ‘additional P.A.’ for the purpose of Baba’s field walks. Baba Himself instructed me how to focus a powerful flashlight on the ground about two to three feet ahead of Him. At night Baba simply accepted that torch light as His guide, for He could see little else.
When I first came to India in December 1971, Baba had very recently given the 16 Points, His comprehensive physico-psycho-spiritual discipline to be followed by all Margiis. In those days there was a rumor going around that Baba had said those Margiis who follow 16 Points would not only receive the ordinary physical benefits accruing from the 16 Points but in addition some special improvement in respect to their eyes and teeth might also be discerned. This was just a story I heard, and it was not of such importance to me that I ever tried to verify it. But thinking back now, perhaps there was something to the rumor.
It is very difficult for me to testify in respect to the matter of teeth for nothing dramatic has ever happened with my teeth while I have been a Margii. On the other hand, I have not had even one cavity in the 20 years since becoming a Margii. Regarding my eyesight, though, a very interesting development took place.
From the age of 14 or 15 I had been wearing glasses of a moderate strength for nearsightedness. In other words in order to see clearly at any distance I would have to wear my glasses. There was also a restriction on my driving license which prohibited me from driving without wearing corrective lenses.
When I was about 28 years old (then a Margii of seven years, already posted as a whole-time worker in Australia), my eyesight was still weak and the same restriction was appended to my Australian driving license. One night, I was compelled to drive from our Master Unit in Queensland, Anandapalli, back to Sydney on urgent business. It was a very dark night and raining off and on. The car was full, and in the back was an elderly Margii sister, dying from cancer, whom we were rushing to admit into a hospital in Sydney. It was to be an all-night drive, and as things turned out I was the only qualified driver present. However, for some reason that I do not remember my glasses were not with me. There was no alternative, so I drove.
It was probably the first time in my life I had driven a vehicle without wearing my glasses, and as mentioned the circumstances were also less than congenial. By Baba’s Grace we reached Sydney without any difficulty. Perhaps I should have been the person most surprised, but in those days I was enjoying an altered state of consciousness wherein even far greater miracles could not have amazed me.
Soon thereafter I went to have my driving license renewed. At that time I was asked to repeat the examination for eyesight. It was found that my unaided vision was more than adequate for the purpose of driving, and the restriction on my driving license was accordingly lifted. Since then I have not worn corrective lenses for any purpose whatsoever nor have I felt any need to have my eyes examined by a specialist.
Is there any connection between Baba’s glasses (which He wore without any real necessity) and my improved vision? That is a question which I cannot answer. Nevertheless there is no question that Baba, through the medium of 16 Points, was responsible for amending my vision, and I offer thanks to Anandamurtiji for restoring my sight.
Beneath the shroud were other scars. On the front of His body, below the navel and on both thighs, there were extensive scars of a very old nature which were still quite noticeable at the time when Baba’s holy body was being washed just prior to cremation. According to one disciple Baba had related the story of those scars as follows.
Baba said, "I was a very young boy of about 8-9 years old. After my birth, many renowned astrologers had seen my horoscope. The majority of them had declared that I would vanquish all religions and establish my own Dharma. This revelation of my future destiny frightened the fanatic followers of a particular religion. They thought that if all religions vanished, then theirs too could not survive. Consequently, they decided to end my life so that the very cause of their fear would be eliminated.
"One day, while I was visiting my uncle in Calcutta, I walked away from the house. The other children returned to their homes, but I had decided to go for a walk in a place that was quite lonely. I climbed up a hill, but those fanatics were following me. When they were sure that no one else was present, they seized me."
According to Baba they tied His hands and feet and fastened a cloth over His mouth to prevent Him from calling for help. Then they tied rags around His waist which were subsequently soaked with kerosene and set alight. The heat was so great that Baba’s stomach burst open and His intestines spilled out. Confident that Baba was dead, the would-be murderers fled the scene.
But even at a young age Prabhat Rainjan Sarkar was no ordinary being. Even at the tender age of 8 or 9 He had already formulated the strategy for accomplishing His Mission. According to the devotee who narrated this story, Baba considered leaving His body at that time, but since this would delay the establishment of Sadvipra Samaj (the Ideal Society) by nine years, He decided against it. Instead Baba got up and collected His intestines, cleaning off the leaves and dirt which had soiled them. Then holding those intestines inside His belly He returned home. Baba was immediately taken to the hospital where He remained for three months. To everyone’s surprise, Baba made a full recovery – except, of course, for the scars on the surface of His body, tokens of His love for humanity which Baba wore discreetly day and night for the rest of His life.
There is a story from the great Indian classic, the Mahabharata, that once Arjuna was confronting his elder brother, Karna, on the battlefield. In that encounter Krishna, Himself, was Arjuna’s charioteer. According to the story every time Karna shot an arrow at Arjuna’s chariot, the chariot would be pushed backwards ten yards, whereas every time Arjuna fired at Karna’s chariot, the chariot of Karna would be repelled a hundred yards. Naturally, Arjuna developed some vanity in respect to his apparent superiority. But Krishna rebuked Arjuna by pointing out that had it not been for Krishna’s own physical presence in Arjuna’s chariot, then each of Karna’s arrows would have driven Arjuna’s chariot one thousand yards back. The moral of this story – and many others in the Mahabharata is that all power ultimately resides in the Lord. The Lord is the Supreme Controller – He regulates everything from the movement of the galaxies to the swaying of a blade of grass. The same power evinced by Krishna also resided in Lord Anandamurtiji.
When Anandamurtiji informed us years ago that the poles of planet Earth were shifting it was a current event that contemporary scientists were as yet unaware of. The speed with which this impending cataclysm occurs ultimately depends upon His Will.
Similarly when Baba chose to elucidate the subjects of biology and evolution, He introduced a new fundamental building block called a ‘microvitum’ and proceeded to give numerous demonstrations of the activities of microvita – demonstrations which, if performed on stage, would have had both scientists and magicians stumped for an explanation of how these ‘tricks’ were managed. But of course these were not magic tricks, they were actual scientific demonstrations but simply of an order far beyond the capacity of modern science (or modern people) to duplicate.
All power resided in Anandamurtiji, but His Grace was always that whenever He gave us any duty to perform He also imparted to us the necessary power to fulfill that task. Almost each and every Margii should have experienced this phenomenon.
It has been said on many occasions – even by Baba Himself – that too close a proximity to Him can prove dangerous for the spiritual aspirant. Being close to Him one may mistake His power to be one’s own. And if ego develops in consequence, then one may easily fall from the spiritual path. This, no doubt, is one reason why Baba frequently changed the postings of most workers – converting a global-level worker overnight into a diocese or district-level worker and vice versa. The code of conduct which Baba has given for His workers insists that we have no concern for promotion or demotion, but rather maintain the dignity of labor and not the dignity of post. These were His instructions, but to be human is to err occasionally.
In 1971 Baba transferred His long-time Personal Assistant. Baba’s wife tried to intervene on behalf of the ex-PA, but Baba refused her petition. After all He alone was the President of Ananda Marga and more important still He alone was Guru.
Perhaps imagining that they, in their own rights, were powerful Tantriks, the ex-PA left the Mission and Baba’s wife, taking Baba’s young son with her, abandoned her husband. Together they sought to justify their vain and characterless actions by vilifying the Lord and joining hands with the enemies of Ananda Marga. A large number of defections from Ananda Marga resulted, but Baba remained unmoved. Even when His wife announced that she was leaving, Baba’s only comment was, "Go if you want; stay if you want."
For Anandamurtiji, no force on Earth could deter Him from the course of Dharma. Though He was subsequently arrested and arraigned on false charges of conspiracy to murder, and though He had to endure additional scurrilous attacks on His flawless character, still He remained unaffected. The most damning testimony in court was delivered by His own wife and His own former Personal Assistant. Still He was unaffected. And throughout His seven years of imprisonment, His poisoning in jail and the five and a half year fast which resulted, Baba never for a moment appeared despondent or disheartened. Even the banning of His Organization could not faze Him.
On the day when Baba’s legal appeal was finally successful and He was fully acquitted of all these mala fide accusations, the news media were expecting a jubilant response from Baba. But Anandamurtiji announced that there was no cause for any special rejoicing as the triumph of Dharma is an ordinary event. To this day, August 2nd (the day Baba emerged victorious from His long imprisonment) is not celebrated as a holiday according to the Ananda Marga calendar.
I was there in Patna the day Baba was arrested, and I was there again on that glorious day in 1978 when Baba came out of jail. It is a fact that Baba was normal, but all the Margiis were delirious with joy. That day Patna belonged to us, and it seemed as if every shopkeeper and rickshaw puller, every animal and plant, every Margii and non-Margii were all united in the festive spirit of the occasion. Of course Baba expressed pleasure to be with us again, I suppose, though all I remember is Him calling a few of us into His house where He greeted each of us individually as we surrounded His bed. His few words to me were, as always, highly inspiring; but more important still they were the fulfillment of a promise which He had made to me.
In late 1977 at my last meeting with Baba in jail, as I was taking leave, He said in an encouraging voice, "We will meet again." My reply was somehow automatic: "Yes, Baba, but not in this place." Baba said, "We will meet when you want; you choose the place." On my visit to India at the end of May, 1978, I determined that I would not leave India until I had first met Baba in His own home in Patliputra Colony. By His Grace, some three months later He satisfied my desire and kept His promise.
It is easy to digress when considering Baba, for our topic was His betrayal by those who should have been closest to Him, and once again we are on the subject of how much love and strength He gave to us. Even under the worst conditions, Baba always put our needs ahead of His. But what was His condition?
From 1971 until His death in 1990 – throughout the last nineteen years of His life – Baba never again enjoyed the ordinary pleasures of married life. Furthermore, during His years in prison, He was unable to attend and preside over His mother’s cremation (as per Indian custom), and He missed the opportunity to observe the maturation of His only begotten son. Indeed, His relationship with that son remained strained throughout the rest of His life – so much so that in His final years Baba elected to adopt an additional son to whom He accorded seniority over His own offspring.
Has anyone else ever had to endure such a betrayal or the prolonged loneliness and distress which resulted from that betrayal? Personally I cannot think of another similar example. Nowadays if a man loses his wife, he generally remarries. Even if he does not remarry he may still enjoy contact with his children. But Baba, due to no fault of His own, lost both His wife and His son and yet could not even consider remarriage as such a course of action might have set a poor example for us and weakened the family structure central to today’s society.
Why was it necessary for Anandamurtiji to undergo such betrayal? The fault was not His; rather it was ours. History teaches that whenever anyone has spoken the Truth in any sphere of life, that person was forced to undergo all sorts of tortures and torments. Baba radiated Truth in all directions and hence His sufferings – and His betrayal – inevitably proved painful beyond imagination. Yet He ultimately overcame all opposition. Today His victorious life and His victorious Ideology are a beacon of light so forceful it can dispel even the darkest shadows of human existence for thousands of years to come.
Poison in the Form of Medicine
After being betrayed by one’s own family, of what importance is it to be betrayed by a prison doctor who administers poison instead of medicine? In any event, that is what took place in Patna on 12 February 1973. Nowadays we celebrate 12 February as an auspicious day (Niilakantha Divas); because like Lord Shiva as Niilakantha, Anandamurtiji also accepted poison and survived. It was an auspicious day but a most foul crime which was attempted on that day. This crime did not originate in Patna but rather in Delhi, for the instructions to carry out the assassination attempt had filtered down a long chain of command from the highest political seat in the land. The price paid by the originator of this evil conspiracy – her horrific doom – is also on historical record, although Baba’s demand for a judicial inquest into His poisoning was never granted, that despite Baba’s five years, four months and two days of fasting in support of that demand. Quite obviously those in power were convinced that any impartial inquest into this poisoning would inevitably reveal their dirty hands. There can be no other explanation, for under normal circumstances judicial inquests are generally granted without hesitation.
There are many devotees who feel that it was the deleterious effects of this poisoning which over the long run destroyed Baba’s health. While I do admit that the immediate effects of the poisoning were most harmful – indeed Baba entered a deep coma from which an ordinary man could not have regained consciousness – still my opinion is that Baba compensated for the damage done by the Tantrik sadhana He performed in conjunction with His prolonged fast. Perhaps this was part of His reason for undertaking such a fast. My opinion is that Anandamurtiji was poisoned on a scale which should have taken His life, but for all intents and purposes He had recovered fully by the time He left prison.
Poison administered in whatever quantity from outside could never kill Anandamurtiji. But there was another poison which was working on Baba’s body which He also accepted willingly. It was a poison which He accepted willingly out of immeasurable love for all His children, for Anandamurtiji was also Hari, the Divine Thief. By one means or another He relieved us of the natural reactions for our past misconduct and took the consequences of our misdeeds upon Himself. In 1982 or 1983 Baba called all the disciples from around the world to appear before Him for a special reporting called Dharma Samiks’a. On that occasion thousands of devotees were cleansed of sins going back for many lifetimes. The experience was immensely uplifting for us – for Baba the result was months and months of ill health immediately after completion of this program.
Similarly in late 1987 Baba personally began to impart a new meditation process to many hundreds of disciples, mainly householders. This was a process which only He could impart as it called for the infusion of positive microvita which as of then only He controlled, indeed only He comprehended. What toll this diks’a took upon Baba’s body no one can say for certain. But it is a fact that within two years Baba suffered His first heart attack.
The real poison for Baba was the ‘medicine’ which He administered to us, not the pseudo-medicine which was deceitfully dispensed to Him. Anandamurtiji’s Love was a powerful fire which consumed all our sins, which negated any and all drawbacks which we had individually and collectively. For Anandamurtiji, no one was evil, no one was bad – all were His beloved children whom He was always ready to take on His most magnanimous lap, personally wiping away their tears and cleansing their souls. Such a precious love must ever have a most dear price. The expense which Anandamurtiji had to bear we could only realize after He was gone – and since then, if truth be known, it has often seemed that it will be we, His devotees, who must honor the outstanding debts which His Love has incurred. For now we, too, are learning or relearning the meaning of loneliness, undergoing the ‘pangs of separation’ which every Spiritual Master has declared to be absolutely essential for completion of the spiritual journey. Perhaps we will have to suffer in other ways as well. If so that is a cross which we will bear proudly and blissfully, for today His Divine Love, which had permeated all of us as emanated from a single source, now radiates through and even from us also.
As this book progresses I find that the subjects become ever more difficult to discuss. The words which I seek to express my ideas and sentiments seem to do more to cloud than to clarify them. And now that I must address the subject of His heart – both physically and metaphysically – I find that words do fail me.
Certainly the medical cause of death was cardiac arrest. In simplest terms, His heart just stopped beating. His physical heart stopped beating. His metaphysical heart beats on forever.
From Consciousness to Consciousness
Again and again, Anandamurtiji reminded us, "I am not this body... I am merged in my Mission." While He was with us physically, such a concept was difficult to comprehend.
I have mentioned that while Baba’s body lay in state I could not view it otherwise than breathing. But now that His body – even His lifeless body – is hidden from view, I am compelled to seek His irrepressible vitality elsewhere. And indeed it is possible to locate that vitality surging through the arteries and veins of Ananda Marga.
Philosophically speaking, everything of this Universe is nothing but Consciousness in one form or another. We all come from Consciousness and we all return to Consciousness. But Anandamurtiji was not like other mortals who come and go, hardly leaving a footprint upon their planet. No, Anandamurtiji was a Titan Whose every action altered the course of human history. His words and deeds reverberate in the individual and collective body, mind and soul of all living beings today and hereafter for thousands of generations to come. Like Shiva and Krishna, Anandamurtiji made such an impact upon this Earth that it will never be forgotten. He Who came quietly, lived modestly and left abruptly will be remembered forever. Those who wish to know Him better had best pattern their lives after His by adhering to the Cult and Ideology of His Mission. Since the advent of Anandamurtiji, Ananda Marga is the only Dharma.
Clouds Cannot Hide the Sun for Long
Anandamurtiji was not confined to any physical body. Nevertheless He did take birth upon this planet, and He did express Himself through the direct medium of one particular body for over sixty-nine years. Hence the body of Prabhat Rainjan Sarkar, Anandamurtiji’s Mahasambhuti, was of a unique significance. Physiologically we cannot easily explain what were the special attributes of that body. Since the cremation such an analysis is certainly beyond the scope of contemporary science. Perhaps in the future laboratory tests conducted upon particles of His ashes may reveal some important discoveries.
However, what we do know is that in all three realms of human existence – physical, mental and spiritual – no human body has ever before been the instrument of such superhuman feats. Physically, the body of P. R. Sarkar survived at least two mortal attacks and was taxed far beyond the ordinary limits by a work load which no other human frame could bear. Mentally, the torrent of new knowledge of every category which was perpetually streaming forth from Lord Anandamurtiji’s lips would certainly have been inconceivable for me had I not had the blessed opportunity to sit at His Lotus Feet on many occasions. And spiritually, the inspiration and the blessings which He endowed, the spiritual upliftment which He empowered, the progressive impact which He imparted – by His voice, His eyes, His hands, His thought – were not simply invaluable but rather priceless beyond compare. Moreover, what He gave, with charm and simplicity, He gave freely to one and all, to human beings of every nationality, creed, color and sex and to every other living being whether fauna or flora, animate or inanimate.
Thus it should come as no surprise that the occasion of His cremation should have been a unique event, imbued with a dignity of unprecedented proportions. For the entire five days from 21-26 October, 1990, while Anandamurtiji’s lifeless body was on view at His Tiljala residence in Calcutta, the sky remained completely overcast with a continuous drizzle of rain falling. The weather seemed to proclaim that Nature herself was weeping.
At noon on 26 October, Baba’s body was carried out of His house to the central courtyard of the Tiljala compound where a special shrine had been erected and the fire pit had been made ready. As soon as Baba’s body had been laid out before the fire pit, a single butterfly, an age-old symbol of Shiva, came and hovered above His body. At the same time a flight of birds in an immaculate V-formation descended and executed a tight circle around Baba’s body, then flew off in a steep ascent.
We humans also paid our last respects without the slightest disruption or indiscipline. Everyone seemed possessed by a remarkable calm in light of the fact that each of us knew full well that what we had lost could never be replaced in this life.
After a brief collective meditation, we performed Guru Puja for the last time before His physical body and immediately thereafter His Mahasambhuti was lifted onto the fire pit. As the torch set flame to the funeral pyre, the sun simultaneously broke through the clouds for the first time since His departure. And for the next three hours, while the body was consumed, the sun continued to shine and the sky continued to clear. Thereafter, as we waited for another three hours for the embers to die out so that His holy ashes could be collected, the sky gradually grew somber once more.
The dominant inspiration for this book has been His mode of leaving this planet. All in all it was no ordinary departure; rather it was a Mahaprayan, a Great Departure. What I have stated here concerning the cremation of His body, the last portion of His Mahaprayan, are the actual facts. They are not embellished by my imagination in the slightest. What took place was so awesome that any commentary on the subject would be superfluous. As with every other aspect of Anandamurtiji’s life, the facts ultimately speak for themselves. Indeed those facts speak far more eloquently than I ever could.
Who was Anandamurtiji? Today Anandamurtiji is Ananda Marga; but before He left us – while He walked among us – who was He? This is a question which may tantalize philosophers for many years to come. For me, when I sit in the rooms where He once gave Darshan or took reports, I simply wonder how such a small space could contain Him. The very fact that He ever lived among us, like an ordinary human being, has become like some kind of dream to me. If I contemplate any simple scene of natural beauty, then invariably I see reflected there one or another of His distinctive mannerisms. A bird flutters its wings, and His hands are manifest. A fishing boat glides slowly down the river, and once more Baba is walking before me.
Who was Anandamurtiji? First of all He was a man who, in His darkest hour on earth, could boldly declare: "I want to see sufficient change in every sphere of human existence while I am still in physical form." And secondly, He was a man who could demand from His followers on the eve of His death the following oath: "All my energy, all my mind, all my thoughts, all my deeds are to be goaded unto the path of collective elevation of human society without neglecting other animate and inanimate objects right from this moment until the last point of my living on this earth."
To take an oath in all seriousness one must feel that the one who demands that oath is worthy to do so. Anandamurtiji earned the right to demand from us this oath by being the first person ever to live according to such a selfless and one-pointed code. At the very least Anandamurtiji was a man who was totally committed to a noble cause. As God, He established Himself as a man; and as a man, he established himself as God.
There is an old children’s story about a mythological kingdom of heaven and an allegorical kingdom of earth. Once the gods and goddesses were observing planet earth from the heights of their other-worldly abode. They noticed some pigs playing in the mud. One god, or perhaps it was a goddess, decided to participate in these porcine games. She or he jumped down to earth, metamorphosed into a pig, and began rolling in the mud. The other gods and goddesses observed this play for a while before a few more decided to join in the fun. Unfortunately no matter how many goddesses and gods went down to become pigs, none of the once-divine pigs ever returned to heaven. Lunch time passed. Dinner time passed. Days, weeks, months and years passed. Still no gods or goddesses seemed able to break free from the earthly bondage which they had accepted. And even those gods and goddesses who had been specially detailed as messengers only to recall their sisters and brothers were unable to withstand the crudifying effect of becoming pigs, a necessary prerequisite for communicating with their deluded, former companions.
Finally the King of all gods and goddesses was imposed upon to take up this all-important Mission, for indeed the heavenly ranks were growing desperately thin, whereas hordes of pigs were busy polluting the planet. And so the Lord of Lords accepted the role of Savior and graciously descended upon the earth. He accepted porcine form yet maintained His true Identity. This Divine pig, by His extraordinary power, attracted all of the other pigs – those who had only the dimmest memory of their divinity and those who had no memory at all of their actual nature – and trained them in the arduous techniques required for them to attain once more the heights which were their birthright. And one further gift was given by the Supreme Lord, the Divine pig. He taught all pigs how to live together in an ideal society so that they might travel together through life, blissfully helping each other on their blissful quest for perfection.
There is no limit to the praise and adoration which may be accorded to Anandamurtiji. He was in every respect extraordinary. But for now let me suggest only that one of the most extraordinary aspects of His life was its very ordinariness. His life-span of only sixty-nine years was three years less than average for a man. He could have taken more time to complete His work, but instead He took less. His powers of attraction were limitless. As the Spiritual Nucleus of this Universe He had only to release a tiny fraction of His occult power and the entire human race would have surrendered at His Lotus Feet. Instead He propagated an Ideology which proves its superiority by virtue of its rationality and practicality. He was omnipotent and as such He had only to will it and in the blink of an eye His Mission would have been established, the world would have been transformed. But He preferred to infuse His power in us, to make His children the medium for ushering in the New Age.
Sadashiva strode across the mountain tops alone -- a solitary hero. Krishna supported Arjuna, adopting for Himself the menial role of charioteer. Anandamurtiji has totally effaced Himself that He may guide each and every one of His devotees from within. We had been striving to merge in Him, but before we could even realize His intention, Anandamurtiji diffused Himself in us.
On the night of 20 October 1990, one day before Anandamurtiji left this world, He presided over the reporting of LFTs (Local Full-Time workers) of Delhi Sector (South Asia). That night Baba’s words were particularly poignant. Looking back, what Baba intended to say is crystal clear. For reasons which should be obvious by now, Baba chose to cloak His meaning behind the thin veil of a quotation from Rabindranath Tagore, one of India’s greatest poets. At that reporting session, Baba took the oath I have mentioned in the last chapter collectively from all those LFTs present. Then Baba said:
"Serpents are exhaling venom everywhere. It is the right moment, it is the proper moment, it is the most opportune moment.
"Serpents are exhaling venom everywhere. The sweet gospels of peace sound like empty mockery. That is why on the eve of my departure from this world I send out a clarion call to all those in every house who are preparing to fight against the demons in human form.
"Serpents are exhaling venom everywhere. Now at this critical juncture, should we go on preaching the gospel of peace? No, no, no! So before my departure from this world, said Rabindranath, I have made the necessary preparation for the fight against these demons. Do you follow? ("Yes, Baba.")
"What Rabindranath said sixty years ago is also true in this last portion of the Twentieth Century. Do you understand? ("Yes, Baba.")
"Can I depend on you?" ("Yes, Baba.")
As mentioned in the Preface, this book is largely subjective and interpretive. Consequently, what is written herein may be erroneous in some respects. Certainly in respect to dates I have not troubled greatly to fix the exact date of many very important events as the timing was not central to the theme of this book. However, there may also be errors of interpretation, and for any such errors I must accept full responsibility and beg pardon from the gentle reader. Again, I am merely expressing my personal opinion which to some extent I have found to coincide with the assessment of many other Margiis. Nevertheless, if by chance some of my impressions should have unintentionally wounded the sentiment of any of His devotees or if my frank discussion of any of these sometimes painful subjects has caused unnecessary distress or unwarranted offense to any devotees, then let me also beg pardon here for those crimes as well.
Setting aside any improbable vindication, there is one transgression which must automatically arise in a book of this sort. I can only apologize most humbly to one and all for the sin of omission. Most certainly this book is incomplete. Even while writing I was constantly aware that on every significant point I was abbreviating His greatness in order to be concise. Knowingly I have omitted many anecdotes which would have elaborated His grandeur and His glory. Knowingly I have omitted many additional points which I felt called for an overly lengthy discussion of secondary issues. Other points were simply hinted at because I could not find the appropriate words to express them properly. Still more points were omitted because they supersede my understanding, and surely the most points were omitted because I am plainly ignorant of their existence. The human eye can only register a very limited range of frequency and wavelength in the spectrum of light. Similarly the human mind has only a limited field of awareness in respect to the manifested and unmanifested Being of God.
I have apologized to everyone, but one final and exceptional apology remains. To Anandamurtiji above all others I must apologize, for out of my vanity and with my pen I have aspired to capture Him Who was ever and will ever exist unbound.
Salutations to the Supreme Father. Victory to my Beloved Baba.